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YOU NEVER DID

Ron de Leon You Never Did

Your smiles were sweet and charming.
Your laughter was nice and soothing.
You made me, and you claimed that I made you too.



But, I can see no reasons to continue
I can see no reasons to sail with this ship anymore.
I need to stop.
We need to stop.
End the relationship we current have.

See also:

https://www.cheszdylan.com/2019/10/13/i-missed/

Let go and probably move on.
I need to let you go.
And you need to let me go.
We must part, for this ship is not sailing smoothy as it was before.

Then you asked me why…
Why would I seek and ask for the end if I claimed that I love you?
I did. I love you so much that it hurts.

And in the other hand, you didn’t.
Because you’re just in love with the thought of being in love.
You never loved me in the first place.

YOU NEVER DID!

See also:

https://www.cheszdylan.com/2018/10/15/haunted-misery-of-dreyfus-by-chesz-dylan/

You Never Did by Ron De Leon

©Ron De Leon


Guest Post Disclaimer

You may or may not agree with the views, and opinions of the author. However, it doesn’t represent the sentiments of Chesz Dylan and its entirety. The author has all the liability for errors and omissions including the copyright claims and intellectual property rights of this article.

I Missed…


I missed the days when I was courting you
The days when I felt like time is so limited
Where all I can think of was you, and —
we are so inlove, like tentacles wrapped up together.

I missed the day when we became lovers
The  days we spent alone eating, watching, laying on the floor rolling over
Where we were contented with each other’s company and —
we just don’t care how time passed by.

I missed the days whenever I go home seeing you in the kitchen,
The day when you have that baby bump and cooking, wearing cute mittens
Where we will eat together, talking what happened to our days and —
we had long conversations while watching television.



I missed the day when the baby was excited to go out
The day when I told that angel to wait for me but she didn’t listen.
Where she just came out with nothing at all and —
we had a rough day because I was only on my way home…

See also: POET[ICAL] NONETHELESS

I missed the days when our angel is growing up
The days when I had to check her out while playing because we were at the 2nd floor
Where she was pushed by a girl her age, I got mad and —
we didn’t allow her to play with that little girl again.


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I missed the day and regretted that day I had to leave you both for work
The day when local job cannot provide our needs.
Where I have to leave you with a broken heart and —
we have to communicate through calls and text messages.

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I missed the day and regretted that day I left
The day when our relationship started to fall and there were a lot of temptations
Where emotionally I was cold and physically it was freezing in winter and —
we had to make it work.

I missed the day and regretted that day that we always had a fight on the phone
The days when I have to bring my mobile to work and patch things up
Where I have to argue with you because of our lack of communication and —
we repeated the cycle over and over.

I missed the day and regretted that day when I went home with nothing
The day, a painful day that I wasn’t prepared to leave the foreign land
Where I trusted my superior for false hopes and nothing and —
we rekindled again at home but the situation was dire for both of us.

See also: HAUNTED MISERY OF DREYFUS

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I missed the day and regretted that day when I have to leave you again
The day when I and our angel became aloof to one another
Where no matter what I try, it doesn’t make any sense and —
we have to pay the price of me working abroad.

I missed the day and regretted that day when I let you leave for our future
The day where I thought we made the right decision because it was our goal
Where it created a wall to our relationship, little by little and —
we are falling apart making a fool out of each other

I missed the day and forgot the day when I started to question myself
The day when I am questioning many things about us that I shouldn’t
Where the trust was nowhere to find and —
we, or should it be you denying and hiding some things from me

Beliosa

I missed the day and forgot the day when we first created our future
The day when your family matters more than our relationship
Where both of us, no longer knew each other and —
we keep on fighting until I requested it quits.

I missed the day, I no longer know if that day will come again
The day when I wanted to do something just to see you
Where you keep on making alibis not for me to come and —
we or it was just me returned home because of our goals, but I was alone

I don’t miss that day, we became civil to each other and we no longer have a future
The day when we were both cold and I don’t know you anymore
Where we fought the battle but white flags are waving at both of us and —
we never imagined how did it become like this.

PIN IT!

I missed …. my old self
I missed…. the old you
I missed…. us!
I missed…. our once happy family.
But… I can no longer remember that time.
I can no longer remember when, what, how and I forgot myself along the process.

And now..
I don’t know what the future holds for us.
I no longer knew you
You no longer know me
I missed…I don’t know what I miss anymore.

©Chesz Dylan | All rights reserved.


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The Father in Me

Working in the daytime, tired at night;
My weary soul took the yoke from the busy corporate world tonight.
"Hush my darling, rest in my arms," said my wife.
"Allow me to ease your body pain, you've been working hard your entire life."

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At the age of eighteen, I was suddenly committed to a responsibility,
A child was born, out of carnal desire and curiosity.
We were both young, wild, free and eighteen,
Call it a fling, a debauchery or unbridled indulgence of passion.
Caressing my forehead, "Oh what a relief!" I muttered.
Her soft hands tapping my head, my heart fluttered;
For that brief moment, I felt the warmth of her love,
That I am the father of her children, they are the treasures that I have.

See also: The Love of A Father

A part of me was eaten by the corporate society,
Needless to say, I am a nobody to my family.
My children grew up and I lose track of time,
In the eyes of my children, I feel like I have committed a crime.
The suppposed-to-be-sundays are not our usual family days,
From Mondays to Saturdays, I am out and returned to our bed only to lay.
Our typical breakfast is a morning race to work,
While dinners are past eleven, just sleeping at the nook.

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I work so hard, but I feel like dissatisfied and unhappy,
Everything was out of place, broken relationships, my life is a mess!
I only realized today when people greeted each other a happy father's day,
That there was a father in me, that I wasn't able to see.

See also: The Boy Who Never Had a Mom


This is a message to the busy dads, who worked so hard but compromised their family’s relationship. Make a time for your family, especially to your children. They will be only children once, so at least, make the most out of it.

Fountain of Imagination


Words created can be a nugget of information.
Sometimes cheap, derogatory or a source of transformation.

In the mind of a lyricist, weaving of words is an art,
In the mind of a plagiarist, evil grins and contempt resides in his heart.





Deprived of love, a motherly love;
Deprived of a family, he wished he could have.
Fleeting years of what could have been a relationship, now just a dream:
Somewhere in his mind is hoping and wanting to scream.

See also: Twenty-eighteen
Haunted Misery of Dreyfus

Birthdays, graduations, and different occasions;
Good tidings and joyful memories in every season.
Childhood, puberty, adolescence, and or his existence;
Adulthood, fatherhood, and all his experiences.

Fortitude, that what keeps him going:
Trusting everything to God, the faith he is believing.
A wife and a daughter that mended that great loss and disarray,
A love he found, not from a woman who once disowned him and ran away.

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As he is creating this sonnet or perhaps a prosody;
He is contemplating from his heart, a familiar rhapsody.
Some things may have come out great and some came out tragic,
But it was all a ride, and life decisions never to be apologetic.

See also: NINETY-NINE ENCOUNTERS

The chapters of his life may have found their direction,
But still, the least part of his identity wanted a resolution.
This is just a reflection that could have been a perfect melody,
But this is just a ballad, a lyric from his heart; from a son who came from a broken family.

All rights reserved 2017.

Twenty-eighteen

Twenty-eighteen

Some goals have not been achieved,
Some dreams might come true next year.

Some relationships may have lapse,
Some commitments might have strengthened.

Some struggles have caused a stir,
Some pains turned into victories.

See also: Haunted Misery of Dreyfus


2018 will go and a new year is welcomed;
You might have failed miserably this year,
But never lose hope for the coming year.

Let the past be in the past,
And armed yourself to be the better you.

Let the future be brighter with positivity,

And face it with more hope, more love and more faith.

©All rights reserved 2018

credits to the owner of the photo
#yearofpositivity
#philippians4eight
#happynewyear
#happynewyear2019
#goodbye2018
#hello2019

Haunted Misery of Dreyfus

At the age of seven, my eyes were opened to the filth of gratification. It was so obscene that it robbed my naivety. I tried to redeemed myself but to no avail. I got hooked and bonded by the disgraceful deed of my unbecoming.  

At the age of ten, the last gleam of purity was drowned in the abyss. I was enslaved to the carcass of my wretchedness. Romanticizing lust and gusto of my youth. Lewd acts of childishness seeping through my veins. Tingling sensation of unwarranted libido.  

See also: Twenty-Eighteen

At the age of fourteen, I have seen so much that I was accustomed to the vulgarity of the trend. The sensation of arousal. The delightful pleasure and the feast of nakedness. I found myself being caught up between the sacrament and perversion.  

At the age of nineteen, I was brought to a new dimension of satisfaction. The Utopia of adrenaline rush that opened a new orifice of excitement. Again did I try to free myself to the carnal fantasies of this world. But my leash was made of palladium of immorality, I was a mess!  

See also: Ode Of A Broken Son

At the age of twenty something, my lecherous heart was fondled by a great lover. It felt so great that for a while, the palpitating tiger was tamed. It was short, shorter than the motion of the ocean. My cravings became more toxic, that I might end up next to a patient with a silent crippling disease.  

At the moment, I reminisce those years of my unbecoming. I fought the battle, but it was just partial, not full. Every night since I was seven, I was haunted by a nightmare. It was grim, it was inducing.  

At the moment, I thought of who I was and what was I made for? I am Dreyfus, your typical neighbor who suffered from a silent misery. I am like you in so many ways. One foot is living in the vanities of life, while the other foot is living in the arcane kingdom in my sanity.  

At the moment, I have settled in my redemptive conscience. But once in a while I am still haunted by the erotic nightmares of my misery. I want to be free!

All rights reserved 2018